Wow
Wow.
I was recently told by an old friend that I ought to get with the digital age and build my own web page. He insisted that it would be fun and easy, the perfect type of project with which to update my skills, while also opening up a new platform for my writing. He teased that. "even a five-year-old child can do it", and then insulted my maturity by hinting that I was incapable of accepting the idea of a pre-schooler being more tech savvy than myself. (I plead the fifth)
It took him less than ten minutes to herd me like a sheepdog with a lost lamb, nudging and goading me right into a promise to give it a shot. He shared a short list of websites offering free web page hosting, along with an even shorter list of URLs for a few sites that are reputed to offer good tips for beginning bloggers. (Why, exactly, did he have that list with him in the first place?). A quick reminder that I've been wanting to return to writing for some time now, and that I'm not getting any younger, which makes me wonder how it is that he can make a single sentence sound like a full on lecture, but without the singing pain of disappointment that anyone else might have injected into the same comment. Having performed the task that it was now quite obvious he'd intended to do from the start, he wasted no more time as he slipped out the door and vanished down the road. My amused ,"I wonder what brought that on?" led me to make a note on a post-it to find out what exactly did bring it on, and then I set to researching how to build and publish a blogging web page.
Hours later, I forcefully dragged my burning eyes from the screen of my laptop and realized that I have spent the entire day as well as most of the evening, glued to my laptop in pursuit of the Perfect Blogging Format (And How To Personalize It When I Find It),. My pointer finger was cramped from hours of overuse with my wireless mouse; my wrist ached from the unnatural angle I forced it into while repeatedly switching between tabs,... CLICK... typing keywords into bing, ....scanning the results quickly for potentially useful information, ....CLICK and hold.....copying any potentially useful information and pasting it into a document for future use, then......CLICK....bouncing back to bing results....CLICK...... getting pulled in by a page offering "Quick and Easy Website-Building For the Brain Dead" ( okay, so that's not the real name of the article, but it should be), ...COPYING and PASTING the entire page this time, ..., CLICK.....following a link to a well-known video sharing site filled with enticing, engaging, and ultimately misleading videos that all seem to promise to have me blogging like a pro, and doing said blogging on a web page that I'd built for myself in a mere 20 minutes !!! ( The improbability of that claim distracted me sufficiently enough to bring me to question the possibility a Venusian videographer; After all, a single day on Venus lasts 243 Earth-days, so a claim of expertise in just 20 minutes would be more credible if calculated in terms of Venus-time )...CLICK...compiling and organizing what I've learned so far and starting to envision the best way to lay out my new page......CLICK, CLICK, CLICK...pulling together elements of the last several hours of reading and researching, adding , removing, reorganizing... CLICK.... searching for an answer to an unexpected problem and having a hard time locating the correct fix to apply, then CLICK tap tap tap tap taptaptaptaptappitytap, as I begin the creative process that drew me to this venture in the first place......taptaptaptaptappitytaptap.... and then a pause ... and pause......and pause .........and still paused .......*Buffering* .....and paused yet some more.....sigh.... (When will high speed internet become available to those of us who live in the boonies?)......and still paused........ sigh (again)...............until I realized with a jolt that I could hear Eddie Rabbit -complete with his entire band, their instruments, and the backup singers, mind you - inside of my head, singing what sounded suspiciously like, " Oooooh, I'm bufferin' my life away,looking for a better way for me.. Oooooh, I'm bufferin' my life away, waiting for a sunny day..."...... CLICK....... and finally, I was able to surf between pages again in less than 15 minutes. As I navigate my way yet again to results for "How to build a simple blogging web page" for what might be the 400th time tonight, amd discover that I no longer need those search results, because I have no unperformed tasks left to do... Holy Moley! I did it?? YES. I did!! I made my first web page! I've created something that I wouldn't be embarrassed to see my byline attached to!!!Yipee!!! (The 1812 Overture has replaced Eddie Rabbit at this point and the orchestra is building to a crescendo as fireworks begin exploding in flashes of multicolored profusion overhead ). I allowed myself a moment to experience the feeling of success and of pride that crept over me and left me feeling flushed afterward. Exhaustion was attempting to replace the warmth within no time at all, and I drew a cloak of cautious optimism around myself and made a review of my newly completed work. It's not perfect, nor even yet complete, but it's complete for the intended purpose, and besides, Eddie stopped singing some time ago and he has been asking whether and when dinner was to be served (LOL) And finally, I felt free again to walk away from my computer/
I've been raised to always begin something as I mean to go on, Unfortunately, I haven't any experience in writing a blog, so I would hope that, as I become more confident in my abilities, I would instead begin as best I can, and then improve as I go on. Which gives me the perfect lead-in to my question: Would you please drop me a quick line or two to let me know if you've enjoyed your visit, or if you notice a mistake, or even just to ask directions to the nearest Dairy Queen. This blog is my return to writing for publication, and it has been over two decades since I last wrote anything aside from bill payments, shopping lists, absence excuses, and journal entries. Feedback is my bread and butter, and I feel as if I haven't eaten in years! Any crumbs you care to toss me will be greatly appreciated, and even constructive criticism is welcome; my ego is healthy enough to take it :-)
I want to thank each one of you who has taken the time to read this far, and to invite you to return if you enjoyed any part of what you've read here. ---- Y'all come back now, ya hear?
Post Script: To my well-meaning friend He who shall not be named, who generously offered the advice memorialized in the first two sentences of my first post....... To you I say, ' GET A DICTIONARY & READ IT! I guarantee that the words 'easy' and 'fun' will not be amongst the descriptors for 'web page building' . Are you sure you're not a closet masochist?
Love you
I was recently told by an old friend that I ought to get with the digital age and build my own web page. He insisted that it would be fun and easy, the perfect type of project with which to update my skills, while also opening up a new platform for my writing. He teased that. "even a five-year-old child can do it", and then insulted my maturity by hinting that I was incapable of accepting the idea of a pre-schooler being more tech savvy than myself. (I plead the fifth)
It took him less than ten minutes to herd me like a sheepdog with a lost lamb, nudging and goading me right into a promise to give it a shot. He shared a short list of websites offering free web page hosting, along with an even shorter list of URLs for a few sites that are reputed to offer good tips for beginning bloggers. (Why, exactly, did he have that list with him in the first place?). A quick reminder that I've been wanting to return to writing for some time now, and that I'm not getting any younger, which makes me wonder how it is that he can make a single sentence sound like a full on lecture, but without the singing pain of disappointment that anyone else might have injected into the same comment. Having performed the task that it was now quite obvious he'd intended to do from the start, he wasted no more time as he slipped out the door and vanished down the road. My amused ,"I wonder what brought that on?" led me to make a note on a post-it to find out what exactly did bring it on, and then I set to researching how to build and publish a blogging web page.
Hours later, I forcefully dragged my burning eyes from the screen of my laptop and realized that I have spent the entire day as well as most of the evening, glued to my laptop in pursuit of the Perfect Blogging Format (And How To Personalize It When I Find It),. My pointer finger was cramped from hours of overuse with my wireless mouse; my wrist ached from the unnatural angle I forced it into while repeatedly switching between tabs,... CLICK... typing keywords into bing, ....scanning the results quickly for potentially useful information, ....CLICK and hold.....copying any potentially useful information and pasting it into a document for future use, then......CLICK....bouncing back to bing results....CLICK...... getting pulled in by a page offering "Quick and Easy Website-Building For the Brain Dead" ( okay, so that's not the real name of the article, but it should be), ...COPYING and PASTING the entire page this time, ..., CLICK.....following a link to a well-known video sharing site filled with enticing, engaging, and ultimately misleading videos that all seem to promise to have me blogging like a pro, and doing said blogging on a web page that I'd built for myself in a mere 20 minutes !!! ( The improbability of that claim distracted me sufficiently enough to bring me to question the possibility a Venusian videographer; After all, a single day on Venus lasts 243 Earth-days, so a claim of expertise in just 20 minutes would be more credible if calculated in terms of Venus-time )...CLICK...compiling and organizing what I've learned so far and starting to envision the best way to lay out my new page......CLICK, CLICK, CLICK...pulling together elements of the last several hours of reading and researching, adding , removing, reorganizing... CLICK.... searching for an answer to an unexpected problem and having a hard time locating the correct fix to apply, then CLICK tap tap tap tap taptaptaptaptappitytap, as I begin the creative process that drew me to this venture in the first place......taptaptaptaptappitytaptap.... and then a pause ... and pause......and pause .........and still paused .......*Buffering* .....and paused yet some more.....sigh.... (When will high speed internet become available to those of us who live in the boonies?)......and still paused........ sigh (again)...............until I realized with a jolt that I could hear Eddie Rabbit -complete with his entire band, their instruments, and the backup singers, mind you - inside of my head, singing what sounded suspiciously like, " Oooooh, I'm bufferin' my life away,looking for a better way for me.. Oooooh, I'm bufferin' my life away, waiting for a sunny day..."...... CLICK....... and finally, I was able to surf between pages again in less than 15 minutes. As I navigate my way yet again to results for "How to build a simple blogging web page" for what might be the 400th time tonight, amd discover that I no longer need those search results, because I have no unperformed tasks left to do... Holy Moley! I did it?? YES. I did!! I made my first web page! I've created something that I wouldn't be embarrassed to see my byline attached to!!!Yipee!!! (The 1812 Overture has replaced Eddie Rabbit at this point and the orchestra is building to a crescendo as fireworks begin exploding in flashes of multicolored profusion overhead ). I allowed myself a moment to experience the feeling of success and of pride that crept over me and left me feeling flushed afterward. Exhaustion was attempting to replace the warmth within no time at all, and I drew a cloak of cautious optimism around myself and made a review of my newly completed work. It's not perfect, nor even yet complete, but it's complete for the intended purpose, and besides, Eddie stopped singing some time ago and he has been asking whether and when dinner was to be served (LOL) And finally, I felt free again to walk away from my computer/
I've been raised to always begin something as I mean to go on, Unfortunately, I haven't any experience in writing a blog, so I would hope that, as I become more confident in my abilities, I would instead begin as best I can, and then improve as I go on. Which gives me the perfect lead-in to my question: Would you please drop me a quick line or two to let me know if you've enjoyed your visit, or if you notice a mistake, or even just to ask directions to the nearest Dairy Queen. This blog is my return to writing for publication, and it has been over two decades since I last wrote anything aside from bill payments, shopping lists, absence excuses, and journal entries. Feedback is my bread and butter, and I feel as if I haven't eaten in years! Any crumbs you care to toss me will be greatly appreciated, and even constructive criticism is welcome; my ego is healthy enough to take it :-)
I want to thank each one of you who has taken the time to read this far, and to invite you to return if you enjoyed any part of what you've read here. ---- Y'all come back now, ya hear?
Post Script: To my well-meaning friend He who shall not be named, who generously offered the advice memorialized in the first two sentences of my first post....... To you I say, ' GET A DICTIONARY & READ IT! I guarantee that the words 'easy' and 'fun' will not be amongst the descriptors for 'web page building' . Are you sure you're not a closet masochist?
Love you
Comments
Post a Comment